The Only One
by Firefly's Locket
Summary: Jenna's baby is coming, and the emotional rush makes her take a chance she might not have otherwise. Now, everything might change.
1. Crushcrushcrush

~Prologue - Crushcrushcrush~

The second she saw Clare, her heart started speeding up. Jenna Middleton wasn't really sure what that meant at the time. All she knew was that everything became about Clare. Even singing wasn't the same. Was Clare watching? Did she notice?

Clare did notice... sometimes. But it wasn't enough. Jenna wanted Clare always right beside her. Any excuse would do. "Want to learn guitar, Clare Bear?" They were so close. So close, that they could almost... but that was just weird. Jenna wouldn't really do that.

Jenna just wanted to be Clare's best friend, right? That's why she was jealous of how close Clare and Alli were. Jenna wanted Clare's priorities to be with _their_ friendship.

Things got stranger, though. Jenna felt a sick sensation in her stomach when she saw K.C. beside Clare. Talking, laughing. They were so close. And then, sometimes... they would kiss. And Jenna wanted to cry.

Of course, it had to be because she'd developed a crush on K.C.. He was so sweet, so cute. And he was a "bad boy". That was totally Jenna's weakness. Or... it used to be.

Jenna convinced herself that she was making the right choice. She'd caught K.C.'s affection... just as she'd planned. But when they were together, it never felt right. Jenna felt awkward in her own skin. And Clare didn't talk to her anymore...

Clare Edwards was over K.C. Guthrie. Sure, the original plan was to get him back, but she was done with that. He wasn't worth it. Of course, she wished him the best, but it wasn't her job to save him anymore.

Free as a bird, that's what she was. No longer letting someone else's weight drag her down. But then, that bird ran smack into Eli Goldsworthy. Clare lost her composure while talking to him. But that was only because it had been such a shock, that's all.

But Eli didn't disappear. He seemed to be always around, if not in reality, then in Clare's thoughts. He was so frustrating! So annoying! So... amazing. Clare swallowed the thought. This wasn't the plan. She was supposed to get her mind back into her studies, her writing. Anything but another guy.

Still, Eli wasn't just another guy. In some ways, he and K.C. were alike. They were both full of trouble. Being near them was like waiting for a train wreck. Only... Eli wrecked happily, with a smile on his face. It was bizarre. And troubling.

Clare was worried. She would have been worried for anyone like that. But somewhere, she knew it was more than that. She wanted more than just his friendship. More than just to save him. Clare was falling in love...


	2. I Kissed a Girl

~Chapter 1 - I Kissed a Girl~

It seemed like one minute I was laughing with one of my best friends, and the next, I was speeding towards the hospital... in a hearse. Clare had grabbed her phone and dialed the only available person she knew with a car. So here, in my panicked state, I was having to listen to Clare's boyfriend curse about how he'd kill me if I gave birth in his car.

Like I'd want to do that.

On the ride, Clare didn't say much. She seemed to be going through a million things in her head. I could almost feel the power of Clare's thoughts, though I had no idea what they were.

My hand brushed against hers slightly, and when Eli voiced his next set of annoyances, Clare took my hand. I'm sure she'd meant to calm me, but my breathing only sped up.

When we arrived, Clare was out in a flash to get me a wheelchair. "It's fine. I can walk, Clare," I protested.

"No need to take chances," Clare said, as she helped me into it. She looked up to Eli. "Get her inside and signed in, Eli."

"What?' Eli said. "I thought I was just the driver! I don't even know her last name."

"It's Middleton," I threw in, aggravated.

"And where are you going?" Eli asked. I wanted to know, too. The thought of being without Clare at a time like this was terrifying. Not to mention being alone with her boyfriend with Mr. Doom and Gloom.

"I have to call Jenna's brother and Alli and... they don't like cell phones inside hospitals," Clare said. "Please, Eli."

"Fine," Eli said, just as another contraction washed over me. Eli cringed my way. I wasn't sure if he was being sympathetic or just irritated. Either way, he wheeled me inside without another word.

I turned my head to watch Clare as she called. I admired her. For the last few weeks, she had "orchestrated" - Clare's word - a baby drill. She'd programmed my brother's number into her phone, and we'd tested getting me to the hospital in a variety of ways. Eli hadn't been part of that plan, but somehow, when it came down to it, he was the one she called first.

I tried to recite the information I needed to give the nurse - another part of the drill - but I was having another contraction as soon as I opened my mouth. A quiet scream came out instead.

Eli cringed again. "Uh, her name's Jenna Middleton," he said. "And if you can't tell, she's about to have a baby, so I'd take her in if you don't want a mess in your waiting room. It's your choice. Personally, I'm just glad she's out of my car."

"And are you the father?" the nurse asked.

"No!" Eli and I shouted at the same second. The nurse looked momentarily alarmed.

I tried to call down so I could give her all the details. Soon enough, the nurse started to wheel me away from Eli, and I looked back, hoping to see Clare, but she wasn't there. I let out another sound of alarm.

"Good luck," Eli mumbled. His words weren't much of a comfort.

By the time Clare got back inside, she had my brother with her. Kyle rushed over to hug me. "The doctor said it won't be long," he said. "I can stay, and one other person-"

"Clare!" I cried without a second thought.

"Are you sure?" Clare asked. "You might want... I mean, Alli is on her way."

I shook my head. "I want you."

Clare sighed, then smiled. "Okay. I'm here for you."

Of course, it occurred to me that it was too much to ask of Clare. I already owed her so much. As soon as she found out that I was pregnant, everything between us seemed to disappear in her eyes. It was just gone. But I couldn't forget how much I'd hurt her.

The door opened again. I expected the doctor, or maybe Alli... even Eli would have made some sense. But it wasn't any of those. It was K.C. looking sheepishly at me.

"K.C.," I breathed in shock.

"Clare asked me to come," he explained.

I looked over at Clare. She was beaming. "I told you that you might want someone else."

I didn't, though...

Before we could exchange any more words, Alli came through the door. She was nearly shaking with excitement. "The Doc is right behind me, but I just had to sneak in and give you a hug!" She ran over and did just that.

The doctor did come inside next and cleared out my friends with a few waves of his hand. I watched Clare leave with a sigh. And then, the pain came again.

Giving birth was a blur. I'm sure that for a lot of mothers, it would be the most vivid time of their lives. I wished I could ask my mother if it had been that way for her.

All I was really aware of - besides the pain - was Kyle with his arm around my shoulders saying encouraging words that were lost as soon as I heard them, and K.C.'s hand in mine, which felt strange... even though, it hadn't been more than four months since our breakup.

And some weird sense of wanting something more.

My baby was a girl with sandy hair like her father. Katherine Middleton. Katherine _Clare_ Middleton. K.C. looked guilty when I said it aloud. "She's a 'K.C.', just like you," I added. He smiled at that, but his heart wasn't in it.

I lost track of time holding Katherine. My eyes were leaking. I didn't deserve such a precious gift. Already, I had proven that. Kyle had a camera and tried to encourage a smile from me, but it was difficult.

When Katherine was lifted out of my arms, I felt like part of me was floating away with her. A part of me that I hadn't known existed but was suddenly completely vital. I told Kyle to follow her. To watch over her. I wanted to go, but the doctor wouldn't let me get up.

"You need your rest," Kyle said. "But are you sure you want me to go?" His eyes caught K.C.'s briefly.

I nodded vigorously. "Please, Kyle." I let out a breath when he left the room. Then, I realized I was alone with K.C., and I could see he was almost awkwardly pacing in the corner of the room. He was blurring in my vision. I dabbed at my eyes.

Suddenly, K.C. turned to look at me. "Don't cry," he pleaded. "Please, don't cry."

I got the feeling he was saying that to make himself feel better. I coughed on my tears.

K.C. looked deep into my eyes. "I'm so sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have-"

"It's okay, K.C.," I said. "You had a lot going on. I forgive you."

He smiled an adorable smile, and for a moment, I thought he was leading in to kiss me. I gave an involuntary twitch, and K.C. aimed the kiss at my forehead instead. "I want to be there for you," he said. "I can't do much... but I'll do my best. I promise." I nodded.

K.C. went to call his mom, and I was left to my own thoughts. Did I really want to get back together with K.C.? It only seemed natural to want that. To be able to give my Katherine the support of a normal family... or as close to normal as we could get. But was that what I really wanted?

Almost as an otherworldly answer, Clare slipped into my room, and my blurry senses all focused in on her.

"Hey," she said. "Everyone else is peering in at your baby, but I thought I'd see how you are doing."

As my emotions came to a boil, tears started streaming down my face again.

"What's wrong?" Clare asked in a worried voice, as she came to sit next to me. She took my hand, and I gripped it. "Did K.C. say something...? Because I never would have told him if I thought it would upset you."

"It's not K.C.," I said, honestly.

"Are you just worried about the baby?" Clare asked. "Because you know, your friends and family are behind you 100%. I'm not a bad sitter, if you ever need me."

"I know," I said. "It's not really that either."

"What is it, then?" Clare asked. She was leaning closer to me. I couldn't take my eyes off of her.

"I'm a horrible person," I cried. "You were the best friend I'd ever had, and I treated you like dirt. I'm so sorry. For everything."

"It doesn't matter," Clare said, smiling. "I forgave you a long time ago. It's in the past. Everyone deserves a second chance." I glanced at the cross on her chest.

I shook my head. "It's not right, though," I said between sniffles. "You've done so much for me. And I... I..."

Clare was looking at me so intensely, trying to make me feel better with her every breath. I couldn't stop myself. I closed my wet eyes. And I kissed her. Everything around me exploded.

It was so wrong but so right. It was everything I'd been wanting for more than a year.

It was ridiculous. Obvious. Disastrous. Perfect. I was in love with Clare Edwards.


	3. Gimme Sympathy

~Chapter 2 - Gimme Sympathy~

I pushed open the door to The Dot with a sigh. I took the closest available table and stared out the window. Had I woken up this morning or was I still dreaming? I wasn't really sure.

I prided myself on handling situations well. I'd dealt with a lot already. Darcy's depression, the breakup with K.C., Eli's ups and downs. And most recently, my parents' separation.

But this was something totally different.

"Oh my God," I breathed. I looked down at my hands. That was the wrong move, obviously. I could almost see Jenna's hands holding mine. I shook my head vigorously.

There was nothing wrong with being gay. This was something I had figured out awhile ago. My cousin was gay. He had confided in me the summer before I started high school. And there was nothing wrong with him. Absolutely nothing. Sure, it had taken time to adjust to the idea, but I eventually decided that I didn't care what the church said about it. He was a wonderful person.

So, when Adam told me about his biological gender, I'd already become adjusted to the idea that there were lots of different sorts of people in the world. And being different wasn't necessarily bad. Adam certainly wasn't a bad person either.

But if Chris wasn't a bad person, and Adam wasn't a bad person, why did I feel so awful? If Chris being with his boyfriend was okay, then it followed that there was nothing wrong with girls being together, same as guys. But all of the sudden, it became totally different. Because I had been involved firsthand.

I looked down at my cross. Was I feeling guilty? _Should_ I be feeling guilty? It wasn't wrong; it wasn't wrong. But it was _me_, Clare Edwards. And that was completely wrong.

"Are you okay?"

I looked up to see Peter hovering over me with a concerned look.

"Hi, Peter," I said, weakly. I didn't really want to answer the question.

"No offense or whatever, but you look really bad... like upset, I mean," Peter said.

"Yeah, I guess that's true," I said.

Peter tapped the top of the chair next to me. "Need someone to talk to?"

I started to shake my head, but then I stopped. "Okay, maybe..."

Peter sat down at once. I'd never thought of him as someone to turn to for advice. He was just some guy my sister dated. I thought of him and his silly band lyrics. I almost burst into laughter at the look on his face combined with the image of him singing in a rabbit mask.

"So, what's up?" Peter prompted when I didn't say anything.

"Well, I guess it starts with... one of my friends just gave birth," I said.

"Whoa!" Peter said. "Seriously? Is she your age?" I nodded. "That's way too youn-" He seemed to reconsider his words. "That's got to be tough. Are you worried about her?"

"Yeah, I am," I said. This was a safe topic, so I went with it. "She's got a really supportive brother, but that's... like it. I had to talk K.C. into just coming to hold her hand."

"Wait... K.C.?" Peter said, looking confused. "Wasn't he... _your_ boyfriend?"

I sighed. "Yeah, he broke up with me."

"And... got your friend pregnant?" Peter asked, incredulous.

"That would be correct," I said.

"That's just messed up," Peter said.

"It's fine; I'm over it," I said. "Honestly."

"So, you're friends with them again?" Peter asked. "And it really doesn't bother you? I mean... you seem so upset. Are you really just worried about your friend?"

"I guess we are friends," I said. "I don't know. The whole thing just sort of happened. I should have seen it coming. I did, but I didn't want to think about it." I shook my head. "But I'm happier now. I'm seeing someone else."

"Oh, cool," Peter said. "That's right, I've seen you here with him. That guy, all in black?"

"That would be Eli," I laughed. "He even drives a hearse."

"He doesn't seem your type," Peter said with a jokingly worried look. "I'm kinda surprised."

"I was, too, but... it works, somehow," I said, truthfully.

"But that still doesn't explain why you're here all... freaked out-looking," Peter said, frowning.

"Yeah, well... it's not about K.C. or Eli," I said. "And I don't think you'd believe me if I told you." I intended that to be the end of it.

"Oh, come on!" Peter said with a small smile. "Just let it out. Maybe venting will help."

I guess I really did need to vent, because it came tumbling out without any help. "Well, I was there at the hospital with Jenna. She seemed all upset... post-giving birth and all. Anyways, she was saying how she was so sorry for everything that had happened. Her and K.C. and everything." I took a breath. "And I told her it was fine. That I'd already forgiven her. But she'd looked so sad that I took her hand... just to reassure her. And then... then... shekissedme."

"Uh, what?" Peter asked.

I took another breath. "She... kissed me."

Peter's eyes went wide. "On the lips?"

"Yeah..." I said.

"Wow. That's... actually pretty funny."

I frowned at him. "I didn't particularly think so."

"No, man... I meant funny in a weird way," Peter said. "Not funny like a joke."

"Oh," I said. "It _was_ pretty strange..."

Peter looked a bit awkward. "I don't like her that way... at all," I said, quickly. "It's just this really weird thing that happened. I don't know how we got our wires got crossed. And I never thought for a second that Jenna... liked me like that."

Peter took a deep breath. "Actually, something like that happened to me."

"Really?" I asked.

He nodded, looking sort of embarrassed. "Yeah, last year. You know Riley Stavros, the football player?"

"Yeah," I said. "Sort of."

"We were practicing boxing... at my place." He cringed. "And he kissed me."

"Wow... yeah, I heard something from Alli about him being gay, but I never would have guessed before that," I said. "But how did you... deal with it?"

"I was super freaked out at first," Peter said. "But I talked to Mia about it, and she said he probably really needed a friend to understand and accept him or whatever. I didn't really want to be that person, but... that's just the way it worked out. We're good friends now."

"But... did you question... if maybe you were weird or did something wrong?" I asked, feeling embarrassed and exposed by my own question.

"Nah," he said, automatically. I stared at him. "Okay... _maybe_ just a little. But it wasn't really about me. It was about him. So, don't like... beat yourself up over it. You didn't do anything wrong. You were just being a friend."

I nodded. Then, I had a strange realization that I was having this - a deeply personal conversation - with Peter. I laughed. "Sorry," I said. "This is just so weird."

"Don't worry about it," Peter said. "Just go hang out with your boyfriend or something, you'll feel better."

I nodded. "Thanks, Peter." He smiled, then through the door, came an extremely flustered looking Darcy. "Hey, Darcy." Peter looked up.

"Don't 'hey' me," Darcy said. "I've been trying to call you for the last 3 hours!"

"I was at the hospital with Jenna, and I forgot to turn my cell back on," I said. "Sorry."

Darcy sighed. "Well, let's go out to eat," she said. "I'm starving."

"You could just eat here..." Peter said. Darcy looked alarmed like she hadn't noticed him there. "Hey..." he said, as an after thought.

"Hey..." she said, biting her lip.

"When did you get back?" Peter asked, standing.

"About a month ago," Darcy admitted.

"You didn't call or anything," Peter said, sadly.

"I know... I just-" Darcy sighed. "I've been busy tying to get caught up with... everything, life."

"Are you going back to Degrassi?" Peter asked.

"I'm not sure yet... I might just get my high school equivalency," Darcy explained, wringing her hands together nervously.

"That's cool," Peter said.

Watching the tension between the two of them felt awkward, but I didn't want to butt in. I knew Darcy had been avoiding The Dot since I'd told her that Peter was working there. I could tell she still had feelings for him, but for some reason, she seemed reluctant to see him. I sighed and stayed quiet until both of them didn't say anything and stood, staring at each other, for a full minute. "Well, I'll have a chicken wrap and a strawberry milkshake." I said.

"Oh, right... cool," Peter said, coming out of his daze. "And uh, for you, Darce?"

"Uh, yeah... that sounds good, but sans milkshake and plus some iced tea." Darcy said, smiling.

Peter went back to work, and Darcy sat beside me. When she saw Peter was busy, she put her hand to her head. "Ugh, I feel so stupid."

"It's fine, Darcy," I assured her. "Don't worry about it."

"This is crazy," Darcy said. "Dad just moved the last of his stuff out an hour ago, and then, this happens. Today is so bizarre."

"Yeah, tell me about," I sighed.


End file.
